There is a difference between being inspired by something and being envious of it. Dream big, be inspired by others, but love and appreciate what you have. Here are 5 things you can do to love the home you have.
Decorating magazines and websites provide tons of inspiration for our homes with creative ideas and glamorous photos. If you follow me on Pinterest, then you’ll know I am a Pinaholic and pin almost every single day! And while I do love sites like Pinterest, unfortunately, they can also lead to home envy.
We’ve all had it. We’ve all felt it. And it’s not pleasant.
I myself experienced it this week when I was browsing online for Living Room inspiration. At one point, I grew frustrated looking at HUGE spaces with TONS of architectural detail and caught myself typing “REAL living rooms” into the search bar. LOL!
But then I remembered that to be truly content, it’s important that we love and appreciate what it is that we actually have, as opposed to envying what we wish we had.
5 Ways to Fight the Green-Eyed Monster and WIN!
1. Create a home, not a house
A house is just a building, but a home is a place where memories are made, friends and family gather, and all who enter feel welcome and comfortable.
We have several model homes nearby and I like to visit them to get decorating ideas. Each time I visit I get a bit envious as to how all of the furnishings fit perfectly in the space and everything is so clean and organized.
But then I remind myself – no one lives there!
These aren’t homes, these are just houses. The toys aren’t scattered around because no one is playing with them. The sofa cushions are perfectly fluffed because no one is sitting on them. And the kitchen is spotless because their 6-year-old didn’t try to pour their own juice, spill some on the floor, decide not to mention it, and then track it through the rest of the house!
Try to create a space that’s comfortable for you and your family; a place where you can relax, unwind and be yourself. It doesn’t have to be perfect to be a home. Remember, home is not a place, it’s a feeling.
2. Make your house work for you
It’s all too easy to get in the habit of trying to work around the way your home was built, but in reality, your home should function the way you live.
My aunt has so many dishes that Williams Sonoma would be jealous. So what did she do? She used her pantry to store and display her dishes and her cabinets for food storage. Why not? Or maybe an unused dining room should be converted to an office if you’ll get more use out of it, or a living room converted to a play room.
If a space isn’t working for you in your home, try to look at it from a fresh perspective and think outside the box as to how you can use the space so that it will work. There’s no need to live within the confines of “traditional” especially when you’ll be much happier if your house works for you, not the other way around.
3. Accept the things you cannot change
This is true of our lives in general, but don’t forget that it applies to your home, too. Learning to accept what you cannot change is a truly liberating feeling.
Yes, I wish my laundry room looked like the one below. Well, it’s not going to happen. I have a small laundry room that is a pass-through between the garage and family room. It will never have a window, it will never be large, and I’m beginning to think it will never be organized! But it is what it is and I accept it just the way it is.
There is a difference between being inspired by something and being envious of it. Dream big, be inspired by others, but love and appreciate what you have.
4. Accentuate the positives
Every home has at least one positive, so play it up! And the great thing about decorating is that there are ways not only to accentuate the positives, but also to diminish the negatives.
When we moved into our last home, it has a very overgrown and ugly front yard. In fact, just after we moved in, a neighbor walking their dog came by and said along the lines of, “I think your home has the ugliest front yard on the block!” (Certainly not a nice thing to say, but sadly, it was true.)
But underneath the overgrowth and unsightly mess was actually a really nice piece of land. Hubby and I spent many weekends out front tearing out dying plants and replacing them with new plants and a new layout that better showed off the yard and our home. It was a positive that just needed a bit of attention and TLC.
Maybe your home is smaller than you’d like, but you might have an amazing view or fantastic yard! Or maybe your home is older than you’d like, but older homes often have more character and interesting architecture that you can play up.
Find what it is that you love about your home and show it off. The rest can be addressed with decorating tricks to fool the eye.
5. Surround yourself with things you love
Have you ever tried on an outfit or cut your hair in a way that just wasn’t “you”? If so, you’ll know that it can be uncomfortable when you feel your outside doesn’t reflect your inside.
Similarly, our homes need to reflect who we truly are as a person, so surround yourself with things you love and that help to tell your story. That might mean you don’t follow the latest decorating trends. So what? And it might mean that your home doesn’t have a “traditional” decorating style. Don’t sweat it! Your home is meant for you and your family and no one else.
Jealousy and envy are just a part of life and we’ve all experienced them at some point or another. And I’m sure you’ll still hear me say that I’m envious of this space or that, or wish I had this or that, but at the end of the day, it’s important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things that we have….and be grateful.
I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend!
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Kim,
This is a great reminder. I need to remember this very topic now and then. Thank you. By the way, I love your home. It’s one I enjoy seeing and receiving the ideas and inspiration you provide.
Karen B.
Kim,
I so appreciate this post. I’m often frustrated with my small, outdated home, and I sometimes wish I still had the larger home we custom built. However, you reminded me of why we bought here, it was the 2 acre lot, on a creek, with lots of space for our dogs to run, and for me to make gardens to make hearts content. There were no plants or landscaping of any kind when we moved in, now I have beautiful gardens, and flowers, and trees, I’ve created a garden paradise in just 9 years. I’m happy outside with my flowers and birds. Our last home was beautiful but we had to sell for financial reasons when my husband was injured. It had a small lot, and I wished it was bigger. Sometimes we think we want what we don’t have. Thank you for reminding me of what’s really important. XO
I love your blog !! I came across it on MUST LOVE JUNK page :) Where is the button for “join site” like on Kris’s page. I would love to add you to my dashboard to scroll through (I’m not tech savvy) Happy Sunday
Hi Christina! Thank you so much!!! I don’t have a “Join Site” button like Kris but there are a few different ways you can follow along. The easiest is to subscribe via email by entering your email address and clicking the verification link once you get the email from FeedBurner. Or you can click on one of the pink circle buttons in the upper-right corner of the site to follow me on Facebook, Pinterest, etc. or get an RSS feed.
I did just look at Kris’s site to see how her button worked so maybe I’ll add one! But from your Dashboard under “Reading List” there should be an “Add” button. Click “Add” and then enter my address, tidbitsandtwine.com
I hope this helps as I’d love to have you follow along!! :) Kim
Interesting! You’re the 3rd place I’m reading about home envy.
How very sad. Envy is just another word for jealousy, which is insecurity.
Appreciating what you have and being happy for another is a much more joyful experience.
My little, under construction mess helps me feel like the luckiest person alive. Ideas? Great. Other homes? Lovely. Happy for them, or appreciating the differences? Oh, yes. But envy? what a huge waste of time and such a Joy Thief!
I feel like I should apologize for just not getting it. I don’t even know what the motions of envy or coveting might feel like — But then, perhaps it’s really Ok that I don’t.
Easy to tell someone to count their blessings, but until there is an intrinsic change in outlook, is it going to happen? Is changing someone’s nature possible? Or does it require a traumatic event.
Eh. Just thinking out loud. I do, however, so completely align myself with the premise of your post. It puts appreciate into every line.
Wonderful tips that i try to live by…and i can only dream about having a laundry room like that!!!
I think if my laundry room looked like that, I might actually enjoy laundry….well, maybe not “enjoy” but at least not despise it! Lol! Have a great weekend!
I stopped over from Junk Chic to say hi. I had to laugh at what your son said about the dc, my son has said that to me about candy I bought one time. Now is that decorating candy mom or can we eat it. Only a blogger. I too believe that our houses are just boxes that we can add to or take away from it until it is a home. I have visited your blog many times and you have a lovely home and you have great decorating ideas.
Hi Alaina! Thank you so much for stopping by and for taking the time to leave a comment! I love hearing stories from other bloggers and I’m glad to hear I’m not the only one that sometimes has DC’s around the house. :)
Great blog – thank you for bringing me back to earth. I do get frustrated sometimes when I think things are never going to come together. I imagine anyone can feel that at times. Failure is not an option !!!!!
:)
You are so right! I love your blog and today was a sweet reminder of what is important and what makes a home. (I still wish I could hire you to decorate my “home.” Haha) great post!
Hi Natalie – Thank you so much for your sweet comments! Have a wonderful weekend. :) Kim
Wonderful post., thank you for making me remember!
Thank you!
Very nice post and a very positive message….and so very true!
Thank you, Cathy! I’m glad you liked it. :)
Great post and things I needed to hear. We just built a new home in a 55 plus community a year and a half ago. Our closet space is terrible and I have been moaning about it. I realize I just have to eliminate STUFF and get things organized to FIT! Thanks for the reminders.
Hi Pinky – I’m glad you found this post helpful! :) Kim
Great post, I have to remind myself often that my small house is still a blessing. Hugs, marty
Thank you, Marty!
It’s so true…but how difficult it is to come to this understanding, especially when you are mentally exhausted by frequent disappointments.
Thanks, it’s a timely article. I am now in that stage of the state of mind that you are writing about. I thought that it was only me who was so dissatisfied with my house but thank you for reminding me that there are more important things in life.
Hi Ellen – Feeling jealous or the need to compete is my greatest dislike of social media – it just makes it too easy to compare! For me, it’s always important to take a step back, which is why I wrote the article. I’m so glad you found it helpful. :) Kim